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Summarize the Darwin Debate Using Just the 1000 Most Common English Words

Our Darwin-defending friends at Panda's Thumb pose an actually quite helpful challenge: Describe your scientific research interest using only the 1000 most frequently encountered words in the English language. Not surprisingly, it's a difficult exercise but a good one since a huge obstacle faced by intelligent design advocates, in seeking to make their case to the public, is that the science behind ID ain't easy.

My challenge to you? I'm curious to hear how, using these same 1000 words (here), you would briefly summarize the idea of intelligent design. Or better yet, the whole Intelligent Design versus Darwinism debate. For instance:

"Someone, a mind long ago, decided there would be different types of animals that would change over time."

"No, we're here because of chance. Animals just happened. I hate you!"

I'm half-kidding, of course. You can surely do better than that. Please give it a try and remember to be simple. Well, you almost can't not be simple with such a limited vocabulary, that doesn't include "intelligent" or "design," much less "teleology," "information theory," or "specified complexity."

And unlike me in the example above, be fair to both sides! Let me know what you come up with.