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Prince Albert's in the Can for Climate Fraud


Now this is settled science:

A pampered hereditary monarch of a tiny 'playground for the rich' statelet has announced that anthropogenic global warming is for real.

Albert II, Sovereign Prince of Monaco (Albert Alexandre Louis Pierre Grimaldi), head of the House of Grimaldi and the current ruler of the Principality of Monaco, son of Rainier III, Prince of Monaco and his princess consort, Grace Kelly, has ended the controversy over global warming. Albert, known for flying in private jets around the world in order to appear for global warming photo-ops and to encourage people to forgo heavy carbon footprint activities like driving to work and heating their homes, has announced:

"There is no more room for doubt."

HRH Albert II elaborated:

"On every subject of scientific nature there is some controversy. There can be opposing arguments or opposing theories. [And] this will be reviewed. But I have been out in the field myself, and I can assure you there are signs already out there of the effects of climate change. You can argue on the intensity of it, on fluctuations on temperature, ... but one thing is for sure: It is happening and it is happening on a global scale."

Albert II said that he had personally observed the effects of global warming during visits to the North and South Poles, both of which he has recently purchased. He noted that an Arctic glacier on the island of Spitsbergen north of Norway had retreated 4.5 miles in the past century.

Skeptics have noted that the Spitsbergen glacial 'retreat' had coincided precisely with a huge "Iced Mixed Drink Festival" in Monaco, held recently in the Prince's honor.

HRH Albert II is the founder of the Prince Albert II Foundation of Monaco, which he founded to address looming eco-catastrophies such as global warming. Albert II serves on the Foundation's Board of Directors with eco-luminaries such as H.R.H. Cheikh Tamin Bin Hamad Al-Thani of Qatar. Albert II announced that we all must do our utmost to stop global warming, and that the burden of saving our planet must be shared. Eco-luminaries can't do it all alone, Albert II emphasized. The common man must start doing his share.

In the spirit of sacrifice necessary for all of mankind, Albert II has founded the new eco-organization called "Hereditary Monarchs for Sustainability". He called on all people of the world to radically shrink their carbon footprint to save the planet. Many eco-proposals would reduce the per-capita carbon output in the United States to the per-capita carbon output in the U.S. in 1860.

Albert II has personally pledged to forgo use of his salad fork during meals on his Gulfstream V jet.